day 9 - Dusseldorf and Giessen

we had another good day
Jayme got some much needed sleep in the Atlanta Hotel
which is what I’d hoped for
we pushed off from Vluyn around noon
and drove half an hour into the heart of Dusseldorf
to the old part of the city center
called Altstadt
it was supposed to be worth seeing
some of the people at the gig last night said not to drive
the traffic would be bad and parking a hassle
but it was really easy getting there
no traffic to speak of
and a handy parking garage as soon as we hit the no driving zone
the weather was great too
sunny and warm
we walked along the cobblestone street
peering into some art shops
and other interesting stores
in 10 minutes time we’d hit the waterfront
we found a restaurant scenically placed under these interesting looking knarled trees
with ultra-green leaves and round little lights dangling from them
our table overlooked the Marktplatz
a cobblestone filled open square
with a towering old steeple begind us
and view of the river in front
it was the best part of the day
Gavin fed the pigeons
took a nice photo of his parents
and ate bread
our food was good too
after lunch we explored the rest of Altstadt
which was only half interesting
it mainly seemed like a ton of pubs and drinking holes that come alive
at night
menacing clouds were beginning to roll in too
so around 3 we headed for the car
the drive to Giessen
a small college town where I was playing next
was only about 2 hours but it rained most the way
Jayme and I both agreed that one reason this tour feels a lot easier than the other two
is that the drives we’ve been making are so much more manageable
we got to Giessen by 5
and navigated the no driving zone
lugging all of our suitcases and my equipment 100 yards or more up a busy street
in the drizzling rain
the venue for this evening
Ulenspiegel
was only one third of a kilometer away (very close)
we walked there around 6:30
looking around for street numbers
it was supposed to be at 54 Selterweg
when we got to 71 without seeing it
I noticed a guy busking with an acoustic guitar
so I asked him if he’d heard of it
he said “sure, it’s down there near the ice cream shop”
and pointed
we had walked right past as it was tucked down an alley
I don’t think we ever would’ve found it without our friendly buskers help
upon our arrival at the club the promoter Toby
greeted us with a great big smile and plenty of hospitality
he hooked us up with the Bitchen Bistro for a nice meal
and took very good care of us with drinks and food all night
the club was great too
nice décor and more great sound (the norm for German acoustic venues)
this was another double show opening for the Late Call
I went on at 8:30
straight out of the gate I was a bit dismayed by the blinding stage lighting
I couldn’t see one single audience member all night
I should’ve said something and learned a lesson to do so next time it happens
I felt completely disconnect from the room for 45 minutes
it was disappointing
what otherwise should’ve been an enjoyable show
was not that enjoyable for me
it felt like I just wanted to get it over with
in fact
I cut my set one song short just so I could get off the stage
I felt like a chicken nugget under a heat lamp
afterwards it was hard for me to relax
I walked J and G back to the hotel
kissed them goodnight
then came back to the Ulenspiegel for my merch
I felt fidgety and moody during Johannes’ set
I found myself spiraling down the steep slope of self-doubt
and dashed expectations
I’m not just over here fucking off with my family
we didn’t come all this way just to eat cheese and look at castles
I’m here to hopefully get some people to listen to “Constellation”
and so far it’s hard for me to feel very good about that end result
after 5 shows cd sales have been meager at best
we’ve come a long way to be here
it’s taken a lot of hard work
and support from our friends and family
yes, we’ve had a great time here
and there will be more to come
but tonight the reality of it all got to me a bit
it dawned on me that this could very well be our last trip to Germany
we’ve been here three times now
crisscrossed almost every square mile of autobahn
seen almost every major city
visited castles
walked parks
ate cheese
soiled lederhosen
been there
done that
been there again and did it too
for the past 18 months I felt a strong urge pulling me to come back here
it wouldn’t subside
even when I wanted it to shut the F up
I’m really glad to be here again
but now I feel like I’m saying goodbye to Germany

after the room cleared I hung out with Toby and Johannes for a bit
then walked back to the City Hotel
here I am now
typing in the dark
while J and G sleep peacefully
I’m so glad we’re going to Karlsruhe and Café NUN tomorrow
it was one of my best shows on the last tour
I hope it comes through again