polaroid (part 3)

don't make waves
i've got dad to thank for this one
he's the role model i fashioned don't make waves after
"good things come to those who wait"
really came straight out of his mouth
the calculating observer
watch from a distance
don't get in
don't get involved
life might tangle you up in its net

you would think the slogan
"stick to the straight and narrow path"
would not be so much a part of my mindset
but underneath my seemingly radical facade
i'm pretty conservative
play my cards close to my chest
at least that's how i feel sometime even if it's not entirely true
i am mr. avoid danger
and more than a bit like dear old dad
the man in concrete shoes

model brothers
a good friend of mine
who happens to be a really good songwriter
advised me to leave this one off polaroid
he told me no one would relate to it
i didn't care
i ignored the advice
it was like someone telling me not to breathe

part of
the beauty and terror involved in making "solo" records
involves trying to capture the essence of whatever makes me
different from every other singer/songwriter/john smith
swimming around out there
in the sea of billions and billions of singer-songwriters
finding who you are can be a strange and difficult thing sometimes

model brothers covers a lot of time
my f-ed up life
with a strange name
a childhood
growing up in el paso
the beatles and the white album changing my life
all the disappointing years i'd spent playing music with my brother
and what it did to our relationship
all in 3 minutes
the wonder of "pop" music, right?

the first attempt at recording model brothers
was acoustic guitar based
i thought it made the song sound too maudlin
but in retrospect
maybe i was just afraid of hitting the raw nerve?
i guess that's why i shrouded the sadness in
cheesy organs
and cheery hammond auto-vari
i made it sound like a party instead of a funeral

p.s.
the definitive version is about to see the light of day
on the pleasantry lane cd
the polaroids played this song beautifully
the way it should have been done on this record
true to the real emotion of it

christmas eve
i wrote this song in the middle room of our old duplex
june 2003
right before gavin was born
i was overcome with love
love for my wife
my son
life
and deep sadness over the thought of ever having to say goodbye to them
the otherside (part 1)

polaroid
almost an MF reunion
faris and tommy roberts played on this one
recorded at f's house fall 2001
during one of our scattered attempts at NB part 2
i dumped the tracks in to my recorder at the end of recording polaroid
added some things
completely re-mixed it
played some e-bow
i like the words to this one
they were written in the middle of the night
this is more like a poem set to music than a song
it's different than what i usually do
i like it