Tuesday, August 11, 2009

"you're just a human...a victim of the insane"

i watched Lennon on Cavett yesterday
it was like he was right there
almost real enough to reach out and touch
so young
so likable
so alive
i was only 5 when this aired on TV
he was only 32
he had just 8 years left to live
when i think of how he was gunned down
in the prime of his life
for no reason whatsoever
i'm consumed with anger
and then sadness
sadness for his young son
and wife
and this deep sadness takes me back to the very moment
i found out he had died
when i was 13
unable to process the information
in some ways i'm still equally unable

at 6am today my friend Ron drove to the cemetery
where his son Jessie rests
like he does every year on this day
August 11
Jessie's birthday
the pain he has dealt with over the loss of his son
is unimaginable to me
still i try to imagine his loss
it makes me shudder
the thought of losing my son would be the end of my world

would John, Jessie and my friend Carter still be with us today
if it weren't for guns?
...quite possibly so...
so thank you Charlie Heston
and everyone else down the line
over the years
who have advocated Americans rights to bear arms
we obviously know what to do with them

i spent another idyllic peaceful Sunday afternoon
with my family
like so many before
i thought to myself
how many do we have after this one?
we take it all for granted
the sun will come up tomorrow
we'll do our thing
just like every day before
on most days like this one
i try to steer clear of these kind of thoughts
they only drag me down
but they also make me see how precious the moment is
we're all so fragile
we're all just barely here
i pray violence doesn't ever enter our lives
or the lives of any of our loved ones


Blogger Ron said...

Thank you, my good friend Salim, for this thoughtful post about the lives we have lost to guns, how our loved ones and Peace advocates like John, have lost their lives, and we've all lost everything they could have contributed to our lives. All the lost potential, all the pain we've suffered. In 3 days I'm going to the cemetery again to visit my son Jesse, whom you wrote of, and who lost his life to a gun 16 years ago this Saturday, March 6th, and in that single instant I lost my son, my beautiful little boy, leaving a hole in my heart that will never heal. Thank you, Salim, for remembering him on his birthday and keeping his memory alive. You're a beautiful soul.

6:23 AM  

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