Tuesday, October 27, 2009

something to cleanse the palate

my friend Carla recently wrote to remind me that
love really is all around...

i'm holding my beautiful baby daughter Miette
in my left arm
while she peacefully sleeps i peck type with my right hand
the sun is slowly creeping
the trees are still and quiet
the sky couldn't be any bluer
the rain is gone
my backyard is happy and full of life
it's going to be another picture perfect day
i'm lucky to be here holding my baby girl
instead of running around somewhere else
scrambling for God knows what
i count my blessings every single day for this precious time
i get to spend with my children

the house concert at the Potter's Saturday night
was another wonderful experience
along with D and C
M and M have created the most inspiring acoustic music rooms in the metroplex
the 4 house concerts i played this year
were some of my favorite spanning 20 years i've been playing live
i want to thank all of them immensely for doing this
it took a lot of effort
and trust
for inviting me and all the other guests into their homes
the welcoming, attentive audiences that listened in to me were this songwriter's dream come true
i couldn't help but think 9 year old El Paso Salim would be thrilled to see this happening
"staring at the little kid i used to be
wonder what that little kid would think of me..."

the hat of random songs dealt me some strange twists and turns this time
the 1st song drawn was "in the blink of an eye"
which is about Carter and his death
i've stopped performing it because it's too difficult for me emotionally
i even removed it from the hat earlier in the evening but put it back at the last minute
i'd just spent an idyllic couple of days with my family
i couldn't feel any better than i did on Saturday night
the last thing i wanted was to be reminded of the sad impermanence of it all
as i stood in front of the Potter's mantle
surrounded by warm candle's
soft lights overhead
i looked out at an open room full of strangers and friends
and felt like kicking into "1978" or "pictures collected" or "montreal"
songs about anything other than death really
but no
the song hat had other plans for me
it had to be "in the blink of an eye"
my little test of giving up control had come to full fruition at this inopportune moment
so i did it
i surrendered
i played what it told me to play
even though i didn't want to dredge up those painful feelings of loss
right then and there
in front of a room full of some people i didn't know
it was difficult...
and then 2 songs later "model brothers" was picked
and i didn't want to go there either
but i did
i gotta admit
it rattled my cage a bit
why did i write these songs i don't ever wanna play when i'm happy?
i train-wrecked "the wicked are winning" which i've never done
i just stopped when the bridge disappeared from my mind's eye
i laughed it off and carried on
but it didn't feel good
after the break i hoped set #2 would go a bit easier on me
the hat started off in the hands of my good friend Kyle Ross
he drew "be here now"
exactly what i needed to start
exactly what i'd hoped he'd draw
it felt like opening the windows on a fine spring day
"don't be afraid"
"she'd walk a mile"
"saint georges" all followed
the ebb and flow of this set couldn't have been any better than it was
i would've never chosen something this good if left to my own devices

after playing for over 2 hours
the 25th song of the night "pictures collected"
put a close to things
Esther and Carla even danced in the back while everyone sang along
thanks to MP for picking that one to cap it all off!
not so random but a perfect ending - he was right on the money

sending love out to you all from J, G, M and myself

Sunday, October 25, 2009

anonymous cockroach

i'm just a guy who writes songs
and sings them
i love my family
and my friends
i love music
and this life
i try to be a good person
i think i can honestly say i treat others the way i wish to be treated
i've never beat anyone up
or shot anyone
i don't like guns or violence
or using violent words
i don't rip people off
or steal from charities
i'm not a boozer or user or sex fiend abuser
i'm interested in peace
and love and human kindness
i'm really happy too
i feel so lucky everyday to have Jayme and Gavin and Miette
i don't have an axe to grind with anyone and i adore this life we have
(so does that bother you?)
yes, YOU anonymous cockroach
who keeps sending me hate messages
do you have any clue how ridiculous and deranged you are?
(of course not...what a silly question)
you quote my own songs too
a nice pitiful touch
how weird that you know me so well
that you've listened to my music carefully enough to quote it
not a surprise who it could be
it's a vry short list
you're not even clever enough to disguise yourself
so i'm wondering aloud now...
can't you find someone else more deserving to direct your bile at?
really - am i the very best you can do?
may i suggest you become obsessed with hating someone a bit more diabolical than me
possibly a dictator of a third world country
or the evil greedy head of a crooked corporation
or even better...any one of the countless murders
rapist or hooligans they parade on the five o'clock news each night
if you prefer to stick to the entertainment biz
how about Paris Hilton or Simon Cowell or Gene Simmons
there you go...Google them all and have at it!!!
it's absurd to continue to waste your time on peaceful happy me
if you're sad and angry
i'm sorry
it's not my fault
you got there long before you met me

it's a beautiful day
i wanna spend it free and clear of any thoughts of you
or your kind
you should spend it free and clear of any thoughts of me
or my kind too
don't keep trolling this blog looking for ammo
it's for my friends and comrades
not you

so here it is again (in case you missed it the first time!!)
all i wanna do is be a good father to my children
and a good husband to my wife
and try to make some good music
live a good, decent life and treat people fairly and kindly
that's all i wanna do
so leave me in peace please
go pester someone else (if that's what you've gotta do)
if you still insist on sending me more hateful comments
i promise you
i will continue to not post 'em
i will delete them

so farewell my sad, misguided cockroach
may you find love and happiness somewhere the lights don't shine!!

p.s. you attack my friends 'cause you've got nothing on me?
beyond pitiful - you are even more pathetic than i imagined
are you going to drag Carter into this next you dung roach

i already know who you are, by the way
when the lights come on what do roaches do?

Thursday, October 08, 2009

Gavin's fever is gone and he's hopping all around the house in his pajamas - things are looking much better now. Thank you to everyone who sent their thoughts and prayers out to us. love - S

Monday, October 05, 2009

Gavin has come down with the swine flu
please send us your thoughts and prayers



Saturday, October 03, 2009

wild life

we've been in the baby bunker
and on the baby roller coaster
these past few weeks
up and down
and all around
we've had some great days and tons of beautiful moments
and then a few bad ones too
mostly it's been good though
Miette is peaceful and adorable
and gaining weight rapidly
the doctor asked last Monday
"what are you feeding this baby? cream?!!?"
she has acid reflux though which has kept her (and us) up a lot
she's uncomfortable most of the time
although she rarely cries
she sort of grunts and makes weird sounds all night
we wish we could help relieve her discomfort
it sucks to see her gritching around in agony
we feel helpless
Jayme's not getting enough sleep
she's super-mom
but it's gonna take a toll on her health
i worry about her
on Tuesday Miette will be a month old
it's already sped by too fast

i'm trying to get my head 'round the idea of playing again next week
i've been enjoying this soft domestic existence
i feel like it's been a year
not just 4 weeks
since i last plugged in and played
well at least i've got 3 great shows lined up for my "comeback"
Tuesday for the Vickery association block party
our 3rd year in a row playing this
and it couldn't be any more convenient
it's only 2 blocks from my house!!
Friday we're at Antone's in Austin
opening for Rhett Miller with the Dufilhos
Saturday i race to the outskirts of Ft. Worth
for Jayson and Sarah's wedding
then to Dallas for House of Blues with Rhett
i feel like i'm needed here to take of my girls
it makes me feel lucky that it's only one crazy weekend
i have in store
and not a string of many weekends
that will take me away from my family

i've been watching old McCartney interviews on YouTube all week
i'm not sure why
maybe because i've been thinking about the clock ticking?
he was so grounded
dedicated to his family
a real role-model to me for sure
i've been trying to zero in on exactly when he became weird
i think it was right around the time Linda died in '98
he aged 10 years in the span of just a few
i guess losing your wife can do that
it's so tragic
so sad
after she died
i've had a hard time watching him since
he doesn't seem secure and at peace
like he was when she was still alive
though i do think the recent Chaos and Creation is a phenomenal record
and one of his best solo records for sure

today i will spend most of it working in the cave
i will miss my family terribly
i will wish i could spend it with them instead
the weather is perfect
i wanted to be there with them
having fun
playing outside
not stuck in here
i saw my son only half an hour yesterday
it broke my heart
i have to make some money though, right?
so is life...